Zach Cole

It’s Britney, Bitch.

Here are a couple things I learned this weekend.

1. DJ Pauly D knows about 5 phrases in English, which are (in order of frequency used): “Pittsburgh!” / “Fist pump when the beat drops!” / “Pittsburgh!” / Random noises / “Pittsburgh!” It goes without saying that his show was disappointing, to say the least.

2. Britney Spears has absolutely zero idea how to sing, or lip sync. This would be more understandable if she actually was performing challenging dance moves - but this was not quite the case. Actually, I’m pretty sure even not-so-talented Vivi on Dance Moms could have out danced Ms. Spears.

3. Britney Spears has also gotten fat, but apparently is missing a gay best friend to tell her so. I think her gay best friend must actually be on permanent leave, because she also squeezed herself into an array of highly age-inappropriate ensembles and looked like a complete mess most of the evening. 

4. When the weather is nice, you must sit outside. We don’t get nearly enough days of nice weather in Pittsburgh, so next time the sun is out or the temperature is up, grab a beer, some friends, and have a party.

5. It is important to have plenty of coffee on hand. Not only will it help you get through the weekend, it just makes everything that much more enjoyable.

6. I’m better at beer pong than I ever realized. Which is great, because you never know when those frat boy skills will come in handy. Oh, and it is just fun to win things … and drink while doing it.

7. I have found myself to be pretty knowledgeable about restaurants in Pittsburgh, but despite the fact that I am constantly trying to eat my way through this city, there is still a lot more I have to take advantage of. I’m looking at this as a good thing, namely because I’m sure I have at least a few more years here.

8. Even coasters can make great gifts. Actually, I usually enjoy most everything related to drinking. Including, but not limited to, cocktail napkins, shot glasses, wine glasses, drink stirrers, and, of course, coasters.

8. Bloody Marys, when made well, can be truly delightful. I recommend having at least two during every Sunday brunch.

All in all, I had a fantastic weekend - and am so thankful to be surrounded by such wonderful people.

SocialMouths.com

Down 5 lbs.

… just saying.

Bikram Yoga has proved to really be quite the challenge - but god damn it do I feel good.

The Demeter Fragrance Catalog

The Post-Holiday Detox

Going home for the holiday season is always delightful, to say the least. However, I find that when I surround myself strictly with family and friends, I tend to let myself go. Add that to the stress of finals, work, and general lack of motivation to go to the gym, my post-holiday, pre-Chicago body is certainly in need of a little work.

Salvation this year came in the most recent issue of Woman’s World. Mock the source all you want, but this is the very same publication that turned me onto the fabulous (and effective) shake diet.

So, what does said detox entail? Let’s find out …

Breakfast

1/2 C. plain, low-fat Greek yogurt (I prefer Yoplait of Fage)

1/2 C. berries

a pinch of ginger (I think I’ll be using fresh)

Snack

1 hard-boiled egg

6 cherry tomatoes or baby carrots

Lunch

3 oz. broiled/poached chicken breast (or 1/2 can no-salt-added tuna … ick!)

3 C. tossed salad

2 tsp. olive oil (mixed with vinegar, cayenne pepper, and herbs to taste)

Snack

15 raw, unsalted almonds or 22 unsalted pistachios

Dinner

4 oz. wild salmon

1/2 Tbs. olive oil + herbs and lemon juice

2 C. steamed spinach + corriander / tumeric

1/2 C. roasted sweet potato

**All meals and snacks are to also be consumed with 8 oz. of coffee or green tea and 10 oz. of water. Artificial sweeteners and salt are to be avoided.

The diet promises a loss of around 4 lbs. a day … we’ll see just how effective this detox will be.

Chicago (and 2011) … here I come!